Funny Sayings

Funny sayings are a great way to infuse a little laughter into your day or to simply put a smile on your face. Without a doubt, humor is one of best methods for dealing with the stress of life's challenges and obstacles.

Positive Quotes List:

A man who correctly guesses a woman's age may be smart, but he's not very bright. ~ Lucille Ball

That's the thing about Mother Nature, she really doesn't care what economic bracket you're in. ~ Whoopi Goldberg

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. ~ Joan Rivers

I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, "Get the hell off my property." ~ Joan Rivers

People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. ~ Bob Hope

Funny Thoughts on Hallmark Cards:

We have been friends for a very long time... (inside card) - What do you say we stop?

Congrats on getting married... (Inside card) - It's not everyday you decide to ruin your life.

I'm so miserable without you... (Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

When we were together, you said you'd die for me... (Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go.... (Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

Happy Birthday! You look great for your age.... (Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

I always wanted to have someone, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life... (Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

Seen on a Tee shirt:

Here are a few examples. If you want to see more, simply click on the images.

Click Here for FREE Funny, Musical & Birthday Ecards from Blue Mountain

Do You Know Someone Who Could Benefit From Inspirational Thoughts and Encouragement? Then Share and Lift's Someone's Day.